Grit

It's been too long.  I had a run that, well, took everything in me to keep from tossing my cookies.  I thought it was nerves from my final finals week and interviewing and picking a job and, and, and...

Little did I know there was a raging bug going around that day, though I wondered why I've been so flush and warm even on my rest days (no fever).  So I took a break.  Which is weird when you want to keep going and going and going. Then I ran 3 short little miles after a week off.  Those were some times and splits!

Did I mention how I started this whole journey???  No? Well, here goes nothing:

I'd been feeling lost.  I was drinking too much and thought maybe I was alcoholic. I even went to meetings, just to see. I liked a lot of the overall message of "the program" but by all accounts, being 150% brutally honest with my doctor and my closest friends, I didn't present as alcoholic.

Pre-alcoholic?  Perhaps.  Drinking too much?  Definitely true at the time.  But the thing I kept going back to was that whole meditation concept.

Now, everyone thinks of meditation as sitting still, legs crossed, all silent or "ohm-y." Which works for a great many people.  Other choose yoga, or some other discipline.  I hated, HATED all of them.

One day I took a walk.  This walk was refreshing and all that, but I still felt something was missing.  Watching my close friend throughout her sober, running journey, I was inspired.  So I jogged a bit here and there on my next "walk."  Then I used this app designed to help condition people from couch to 5K (3.1 miles) and sorta did some stuff with it.  I went, from July to November 2016, from a 17:56 "run" to a 13:51 pace.  Nothing to write home about, but I stuck with it.  This was my new meditation.

That first run coming off being sick last week: 12:40 average pace!

So listen to your body.  Take fitness classes during the winter if running outside is too difficult or impractical altogether.  But sometimes you gotta cut yourself some slack. Here I was thinking I was being a big baby about an upset tummy and it was a crazy virus the whole time.  I'm still not thrilled about the missed runs, but part of the journey is overcoming setbacks.

My long run this past Sunday.  It took half the morning to talk myself into getting it done: 6 miles with a 14:49 pace...ewwwwww! It was hotter and more humid than expected. And I shall continue to chug along!